A Volunteer Coach Shoved Me During a Kids’ Soccer Game

A volunteer coach looked at me, told me my team was pushing his kids, then put his shoulder into me and shoved me with his arm.

I was 22 years old, working a youth soccer game, and I had to decide pretty quickly how I was going to react.

I’ve spent the past five years working in youth sports and am now a Sports Coordinator. I coach and officiate several sports, have worked at sports camps, and have also coached and trained kids privately.

On this particular day, I was coaching indoor soccer with 7- to 9-year-olds. The other team had moved up from the 5–6 age group, so our players were generally bigger and more physical. Kids from both teams collided while going for the ball, and the opposing coaches got frustrated that fouls weren’t being called.

Eventually, one of the volunteer coaches had enough. He told me, “Your team is pushing our kids,” and then shoved me.

I was obviously frustrated. I didn’t expect an adult volunteer coach to put his hands on me during a kids’ soccer game. But I also knew I didn’t want to stop the game, say something I would regret, or make the situation worse.

So I walked away from him and kept coaching.

After the game, management addressed the situation. There had been previous issues involving the coach, and the organization ultimately decided that he and his child would no longer participate in the program.

Staying calm in the moment didn’t mean pretending what happened was OK. I could control how I reacted and let the people responsible for making that decision handle it.

My experience also wasn’t an isolated one.

On August 29, 2026, a brawl broke out between coaches at a youth football game in Pennsylvania. An argument between adults turned into a fight while elementary school-aged kids watched and officials tried to get them away from it.

Whatever the original disagreement was, fighting in front of the kids wasn’t going to solve it. What stood out to me was that these were adults coaching children, while the children watched the adults lose control.

I’ve seen the opposite happen too.

During another game, I officiated while one of my coworkers coached. A misunderstanding about the timing of halftime led one of the volunteer coaches to start yelling at my coworker.

Instead of yelling back, I stepped in and calmly explained what had happened. Once he understood the situation, he calmed down.

It wasn’t some huge moment. But compared with what happened when I was shoved, it reinforced something for me.

Staying calm doesn’t mean letting someone walk all over you. It means controlling your own reaction and figuring out the best way to handle what is happening.

Working in youth sports has given me a lot of chances to see what people are like when they’re frustrated, competitive, or convinced something isn’t fair. I’ve gotten better at recognizing what I can actually control.

Getting shoved by a volunteer coach wasn’t something I expected to deal with at 22. But the way I handled it is something I’ll remember.

When emotions are high, staying calm isn’t a weakness.

It’s leadership.

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